I wouldn't feed this to a dog...

I had wanted a dog forever and then one fell in my lap. Almost literally. She is a purebred "Haitian Labrador" who still thinks she's a puppy or a human, depending on the situation, and a gift from a wonderful friend. I am not ashamed to call her my baby and snort whenever anyone tries to mention "maternal transference." Uh, yeah...and next on the list of Shocking Insights, Richard Simmons is gay?

Of course, I put more thought into the dog’s dinner than into my own. So I took a page from Jeffrey Steingarten (who had the same insight) and created this. It’s hardly rocket science, and I don’t obviously mix in kibble with my serving, but at least I’m getting my veggies and protein. And for the animal cruelty fascists – the alcohol cooks off. I’m not strict on the herbs and veggies – frankly it’s a nice way to use up what’s in the fridge. I’ll also throw in fresh or canned tomatoes.

Abby's Beef Stew for Dogs and Their Owners

2 pounds tenderloin tips

1 tsp soy sauce

2 T olive oil

2 medium carrots

2 small/medium or one large onion

2 stalks celery

4 large cloves garlic

2 stalks rosemary

½ can tomato paste

½ bunch parsley

1 pound baby potatoes

1 zucchini

1 bottle good red wine (I used a Shiraz, but Beaujolais would be OK too)

1 can beef broth

1 tsp unflavored gelatin

2 bay leaves

6 peppercorns

Grated Parmesan

Salt & pepper to taste

Preparation: Peel garlic and smash one clove with knife. Cut beef into cubes and sprinkle with salt, pepper, smashed garlic and soy sauce and toss; set aside for ½ hour. Dice vegetables, except for potatoes. Make sure they are well-scrubbed with the peel on and cut into halves or quarters. Chop herbs finely. Open wine bottle and pour yourself a glass to sip while cooking (can pour out up to 2 glasses of wine – you use just shy of a bottle, and this is a more fun way of measuring that).

Start stew: Heat oil to shimmering in a large stockpot or soup pot (I use a cast-iron Dutch oven). Add beef and brown/sear, turning with tongs. Lift out beef cubes with tongs and set aside, tenting with foil. Add onions and sauté until onions are translucent. Smoosh in rest of garlic with press. Add carrots, celery, bay leaves, peppercorns and rosemary and sauté well. Add tomato paste and sauté quickly (removes canned flavor). Add zucchini and potatoes. Pour ¼ cup beef broth into a small bowl and add rest of broth to stew. Slowly pour in remaining wine, stir to bring up bits from bottom and bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer, adding ½ of parsley. Simmer for about an hour, stirring occasionally (make sure to taste and check for wininess). Sprinkle gelatin over remaining broth and stir well. Let sit for 5 minutes and then add to stew, stirring well.

Serve stew: Ladle into bowls and top with more parsley and grated Parmesan. Or mix with kibble and top with grated Parmesan (you laugh). Serves 2 large dogs and 4 owners.

Who cries at mac and cheese?

Mac n’ cheese, or macaroni gratin, is a staple in Haiti. Sometimes they make it with chicken in it, which is a delicious addition and a great way to use up leftovers. I initially had tried Amanda Hesser’s grandmother’s recipe for mac n’ cheese but found it bland and wanting – perhaps because I am hell and gone from a Mennonite farmers’ market for country ham and greenmarket-quality tomatoes and thus could not "weep with pleasure" when I ate mine, although it was pretty good.

So, after falling off my chair laughing at Amanda’s purple prose and horror of everyday ingredients (“Regular” butter! As opposed to what, Amanda? “Cheese from the supermarket”! Oh, the shame! How could you eat cheese that wasn’t raised on a sustainable practices farm in upstate New York run by a former investment banker!), I made some modifications that perhaps even the Princess of Fairway and those of us who shop at Pathmark could manage.

Mac n’ cheese that has some forkability to it and some taste requires some key elements: bigger pasta and a blend of cheeses – one for flavor, one for meltability and good Parmesan (no subs for the latter). It is nice with Amanda’s preferred ham and tomatoes, or with tuna and peas. Go nuts. This is also why I pumped up the béchamel from the original recipe – the bigger pasta plus ingredients requires a bathing in the sauce. And for all of you pasta nitpickers - in Jersey, everything is macaroni. So there.


Macaroni and Cheese (adapted from Amanda Hesser’s grandmother Helen Getz and printed in her book Cooking for Mr. Latte):

3 T butter, plus some extra for the dish
3 T flour
3 cups milk (at least 2% fat - I had trouble getting skim milk to thicken into a béchamel)
2 cups uncooked ziti, rigatoni or other tubey pasta (I use whole-wheat)
1 cup grated Monterrey or pepper jack cheese, plus ¼ cup for the top
1 cup grated extra-sharp cheddar or smoked cheddar
½ cup grated Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese
1 cup leftover cubed ham, pulled chicken or drained canned tuna, lightly flaked but still chunky [optional]
1 cup chopped fresh tomatoes without seeds, drained canned tomatoes or peas (thawed if frozen) [optional]
1 cup coarse bread crumbs (I neurotically hollow out baguettes when I use them for sandwiches, so instead of the dog getting the hollowed-out bread, I toasted it in the oven when it was preheating and then whizzed it in the little food processor to make crumbs)
¼ tsp cayenne pepper
¼ tsp paprika
1 garlic clove, lightly smashed
Fresh ground pepper and salt

Preparation: Preheat oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit. Butter a deep casserole dish. Boil pasta until al dente (6-7 minutes – you don’t want gloppy, wimpy pasta…it should have that thin raw ring around it when you bite into it) and drain, keeping warm. Mix Parmigiano-Reggiano with breadcrumbs.

Make sauce: Melt butter until foamy over medium heat. Whisk in flour one tablespoon at a time, making sure each one is thoroughly incorporated. Cook until it’s dark gold and no longer smells raw. Slowly add milk, whisking all the while. Add garlic clove. Bring to a simmer and keep whisking, but pause every now and then to let it thicken. When it’s ready, it should lightly coat the back of a spoon but still be loose. Remove garlic clove and add cayenne pepper, paprika and some black pepper. Add in Monterrey Jack cheese and whisk thoroughly to incorporate. Add cheddar and do the same.

Assemble and bake: Fold in pasta, then other ingredients. If using canned whole tomatoes, squeeze with your fingers into small pieces. Sauce should still be fairly thin but clinging to ingredients. Taste and check salt and other seasonings. Pour all into casserole dish. Sprinkle Parmigiano breadcrumbs evenly over surface and then sprinkle rest of Monterrey Jack. Grind some pepper on top and bake about 30 minutes, until brown and bubbly on top.

Serves 4-6, as a side or main dish.

Cookiegasm

"Oooohhhhhhhhh," groaned the July 4th BBQ guest as he bit into one of these. He then proceded to eat five more, and leaned over to whisper in my ear before he left, "I'm going to write you a poem about these." Mind you, this was a normal, red-blooded kind of dude not given to fripperies like poetry-writing. The other red-blooded male who moaned when he ate one hugged me for about 10 minutes. In front of his beautiful French girlfriend. Who, once she had one too, was more than understanding.

When I initially developed this recipe, I had brought good chocolate chips with me (Ghiradelli 60% cocoa bittersweet, the King of all Chips) and was thinking of a way to use them. I also found myself missing the white chocolate-dried cherry-walnut cookies from the Ogilvy cafeteria. So after some messing around on the Internet to find insider’s tips on better cookie baking (because I never liked my own chocolate chip cookies), I came up with these. I did cut back on the granulated sugar since there are so many sweet ingredients and I don’t like overly cloying-sweet cookies. The Web was really useful on the hints. Sour cream, you say? More fat, you gasp? Hell, yeah…they really worked to keep the cookies moist. And thanks to the Bible of food science, Cook's Illustrated, for pointing out that sugar is what makes cookies deliciously chewy, from the melting and caramelization processes.


Fancy Chocolate Chip Cookies

2 ¼ cups all-purpose flour
1 tsp baking soda
1 ½ tsp kosher salt or 1 tsp table salt
½ cup butter
¼ cup oil
1 cup packed dark brown sugar
½ cup granulated sugar
1 T vanilla, rum or Grand Marnier
2 large eggs, 1 separated
1 heaping T sour cream
1 package bittersweet chocolate chips
½ cup chopped pecans or walnuts [optional]
½ cup orange Craisins (dried cranberries) [optional]
1 tsp Chinese five-spice powder [optional]

Preparation: Melt butter but don’t scorch (45 seconds in the micro is usually enough for refrigerator-cold butter). Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Cover baking sheet with parchment paper.

Make batter: Mix butter, sugars, 1 whole cracked egg and one yolk (set white aside and feed to dog for dinner) and vanilla. Add flour one cup at a time for first 2 cups, stirring to incorporate after each cup. Mix baking soda and salt with last ¼ cup of flour and add, stirring well. Add five-spice powder if using. Add oil and sour cream and stir. Fold in chocolate chips, nuts and Craisins.

Bake cookies: Drop by heaping tablespoonfuls onto baking sheet, pressing a little to flatten. Refrigerate dough between batches. Bake for 16-20 minutes (check for solidity at 16 minutes; cookie should be firm but not rock-hard, but not totally gooey and squashy. If still too uncooked-like, leave in for 4 more minutes). Remove from oven, leave on cookie sheet for a minute, then transfer to wire rack to cool. Makes about 3 dozen cookies with some dough left over for eating.

This makes crispy, chewy cookies. If you want a more cakelike, tender cookie, leave in the extra egg white. A small, but amazing, difference!

Bonne Fête d'Indépendence!!

Happy Fourth, everyone! Happy hot dogs, fireworks and beach time!

The Fourth used to mean either fried chicken and Bing cherries on my rooftop in the Village while watching the Macy's fireworks show, or else some sort of Hampton. Now - it's work. And it sucks. But at least it's one day in a foreign country when you can be unapologetically American, eat BBQ, drink bad beer and chill in your shorts. At least on my day off I can.

This salad was actually created for the combined bachelor/bachelorette BBQ I hosted for two friends here. Light, tasty, healthy and filling. Pasta salad is usually so boring and soggy for me, but I love this. As did everyone at the party. Plus, it’s colorful and pretty, and goes well as a healthier side with burgers, dogs, whatever...or on its own with grilled chicken and broccoli.


Lemony Greek Pasta Salad

1 lb. corkscrew pasta
6 large red bell peppers
1 pint grape tomatoes
4 green onions
3 medium cloves garlic
1 jar or 1 pint container kalamata olives, pitted
8 oz feta cheese
16 large basil leaves
1 lemon
1 cup extra-virgin olive oil
½ cup red wine vinegar
Pinch of red pepper flakes
(optional) 2 cups blanched broccoli florets
(optional) 2 medium grilled chicken breasts, diced into large chunks

Preparation: Preheat oven to 400 degrees Fahrenheit. Cut peppers in half lengthwise. Lightly oil a baking sheet and place peppers on it cut side down. Roast in oven at least 1 hour, or until skins are blistered and black in spots. Meanwhile, boil pasta in lightly salted water for 7 minutes (should still be al dente); drain and rinse quickly but not thoroughly. Slice olives in half lengthwise. Slice tomatoes in half lengthwise. Dice feta. Chop green olives. Chiffonade basil. Once peppers are done, peel skins, slice in half crosswise and then slice into strips.

Make dressing: Measure vinegar into small sturdy bowl. Cut lemon in half and squeeze all juice into vinegar, then zest lemon peel into vinegar (you want it finely grated, so use a rasp grater). Smoosh in 2 of the garlic cloves. Add pepper flakes. Whisk well, adding oil in a thin slow stream to emulsify.

Make salad: Toss everything together in large bowl. Smoosh in last clove of garlic and toss again. Add fresh-ground black pepper to taste.

Serves 8-10 as a side dish; with chicken and broccoli, serves 6 as a main dish.

Not just for breakfast anymore...

One of my very few pleasures here is sitting on my veranda in my nightgown with my morning coffee on a tray, reading a week-old Sunday New York Times, occasionally gazing at my garden and the trees, while tossing tennis balls for the dog. This morning, I think I even saw a hummingbird near one of my flower bushes. Birds coming back to my yard to me are a sign of hope that things are getting back to normal here, because last year at this time, there was nary a songbird to be heard. Just the damned neighborhood rooster.

My reverie is usually followed by toast, but lately this has been breakfast for me. Spaghetti is a popular way to start the day here (with ketchup. Oh, the horror), which I have only lately come to appreciate. The egg in the aioli at least makes it a little breakfasty. This dish is surprisingly delicious, quick and pretty easy to have on hand, except for the herb aioli. But now that I have this fabulous mini-food processor attachment on my cheapo blender, I am never going back to Hellman’s. It takes all of 2 minutes maybe to throw the aioli together- again, all with ingredients that you probably have on hand. Spring for the good stuff – if I can find bottled San Marzano tomato concasse (very smooth, thin puree of tomatoes, basil and salt) and Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese in Haiti, chances are so can you wherever you are.


Spaghetti with Tuna

½ pound whole wheat spaghetti or cappellini
¼ cup San Marzano tomato concasse or tomato sauce (it needs to be very thin and smooth for this to work and taste does make a difference. Avoid Hunt's crap in a can if possible)
2 T herb aioli
2 T extra-virgin olive oil
¼ cup grated Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese
2 3-oz cans solid white tuna, drained

Make spaghetti: bring about 2 quarts of water, salted, to boil. Add pasta and cook for 7-8 minutes, until al dente. Scoop out and reserve about ¼ cup of pasta water and drain rest.

Make sauce: return pasta to pot and toss with tomato concasse first. Then add aioli and toss quickly and thoroughly so that egg does not scramble. Add a little reserved pasta water to make a smooth sauce and toss. Add tuna in big chunks, plus cheese and toss again to distribute. Top with olive oil, freshly-ground black pepper, toss again and divide between two plates.

Serves 2, in the morning or anytime.

Bienvenue!

Welcome to the ComplEater!

Here you'll find original recipes, musings and the occasional eating diary for those times when I feel fat.

Enjoy!